Can't Handle me
by FiveMeterHockeyStick
Summary: Gilbert takes Matthew to his favorite club in hopes of showing his new friend a damn good time with music, great beer and chicks! / Rate M for smut, pole dancing, AU/ PruCan


Club can't even handle me right now blared over the speakers of the quiet lively dance club, making the Canadian wonder more and more why he had agreed to come out with his albino friend, it was clear he didn't belong…or it was to him. This was so more Gilbert's scene than his own, Matthew stared at his friend's face as he zoned out, most likely thinking of how much fun he was gonna have.

He caught the boy staring at him, smirking, talking over the thumping music. "It's gonna be an awesome night, Mattie." He didn't wait for any kind of reply, just walked straight in to the crowd like he expected them to part at this presence. The blond just smiled, shaking his head, following him the best he could.

They managed to snag a table no one was bothering with, everyone seemed to be dancing the night away, the colorful light flashing and sparkling over the dance floor. This wouldn't be so bad, Matthew thought, watching his friend's crimson eyes light up with excitement he felt from the crowd, if Gilbert didn't have a habit of hitting on every pretty girl he saw, it was just…bothersome..

Matthew sighed. _Crushing on a straight guy, you're just so smart aren't you? _He couldn't believe that he had and so soon after meeting the guy!

As if on que, a very cute girl found her way off the dance floor, making a bee line to Gilbert, having him in her sights. "Well hello there.." She greeted coyly, the music less loud where they were sitting. Her green eyes seemed to just devour the Prussian, scouring every inch of him, it made Matthew have to look away. _Bitch…_

Gilbert smirked; he couldn't blame her for wanting to come bask in his awesome, it was just natural. "Hey there, baby. Come for somethin'?"

"Oh you know I did." She smirked, doing her best to be sexy. Gilbert thought she was cute, not that sexy though. He glanced to side, seeing Matthew with a sour look on his face. _Oooh? Does he want her? Kesese.._

"Ya know, I'd love to dance, but my buddy here is just dying to get on the floor." He said, going over to the surprised blond, pulling him up out of his chair.

The girl looked very disappointed, but looked Matthew over, looking a bit offended. "I don't dance with other girls, not that kind of girl!" She snapped.

Matthew blushed, frowning. _I look like a girl? How disappointing…_He thought depressed.

Gilbert pulled open Matthew's casual jacket, showing off his flat chest, his hand also sweeping over it for effect, causing the blond to shiver against his will. "He's a dude, girly." He said very annoyed.

The girl just huffed and turned on her heel. "Only wanted to see if you wanted a good time, honey, oh well, your loss." She threw a sensually look over her shoulder than walked back to the dance floor.

"G-Gil, why did you d-do that?" Matthew blushed, the Prussian still holding him.

"I think you need to get laid, Mattie." He said very bluntly, causing the Canadian to sputter indignantly.

"What the hell for?" He demanded, blushing harder when Gilbert rested his chin on his shoulder in thought.

"Hmm, cause I feel like it. I never see you with a girl and its bout time you get laid Mattie!" He said, oblivious to the deep red settling on the boy's cheeks. "So the awesome will take it upon myself to you and some hot chick in the sack!" He proclaimed.

"I don't want that at all!" Matthew protested, fleeing from his friend's arms, hiding behind the other side of the table, completely embarrassed at Gilberts bluntness.

"Kesese, you should feel honored I'm offering. Now what's your type?" Gilbert asked, taking the seat Matthew had been using earlier.

"I…I don't.." _I don't like girls…_Matthew was too scared to tell Gilbert he was gay, he had no idea how he would react. He's already lost his Cubin friend because of it, he wasn't going to lose Gilbert to. "I don't have a type, please just drop it!" He pleaded, widening his blue-violet eyes.

Gilbert looked away, he could never resist that cute fuckin face. _It's a shame he doesn't swing. _He thought, putting his hands up in defense. "Alright alright, Mattie, don't get your tiny panties in a bunch." He smirked at the idea, making the Canadian blush, causing his smirk to widen.

"S-So how about s-some beer?" Matthew suggested, looking over at the crowded bar, willing his blush away. He was far embarrassed and stressed enough as it was.

"Oh fuck yea, I hope they have awesome kind and not that shity American stuff." He said as they both made their way to the bar side.

The next couple of minutes were full of crowding, wiggling to the front, yelling over the music, waving at the bar tender and getting very ignored. Gilbert did not handle being ignored well, his ego didn't understand it. Matthew saw he was about to start a fight or jump over the bar itself, he couldn't let that happen…So it was time to something embarrassing.

He quickly took off his jacket, how Gilbert had convinced to where this skin tight long sleeve shirt with this funky t-shirt over it and skinny jeans was beyond him. He whistled at the bar tender as he walked past. It got his attention and Matthew kept it with a coy face he made at him, knowing full well this guy was gay.

"Hi." He smiled softly, half lidding his eyes, this drew him close. _Score._

"Hey there, what can I get for ya?" The guy grinned; his eyes raking over Matthew, making him feel a bit violated.

"I'd like two beers, German if you have any?" He asked softly, batting his eyes just enough to make the guy smirk.

"I'll see what I can do, cutie." He disappeared into the back of the bar, not being gone long, bringing back a box and putting it under the counter, pulling out two beers from it. "On the house." He said with a wink.

Matthew blushed. "O-Oh no, I couldn't jus~" He was cut off by the bottles pushed into his hands.

"It's on me, babe." This caused him to blush more, but not to just take something for nothing, he leaned over and kissed the guy on the cheek.

"Thank you so much~!" He smiled, battling out of the crowd, hoping no one had seen that.

"Duuuuuuude." But of course Gilbert did…eyes like a fucking hawk. Matthew sighed and turned around to see the smirking Prussian. "You were flirting with that guy."

"H-He thought I was a girl!" He lied. "I-I just did it to get his a-attention…"

"So the sexy stare and batting eyes were for fun?"

_Fuck…how close was he? _Matthew panicked. "Eh! W-Well…uh…Here!" He said, shoving a beer at his friend. "I did it for the beer! Yea…" He tried to defend.

Gilbert took it happily, than a thought came to him. "Wait..I have your money..how did you pay?"

Matthew blushed brightly, stupid skin tight pants! "W-Well…he g-gave it to me for f-free..." He muttered. The albino just cracking up laughing.

"Well you do make one sexy chick." He smirked, getting a glare from the Canadian; it wasn't very threatening with that deep blush.

"Let's just go sit down, okay?" He said, going back over to their table, it still being empty, the night was very lively and the music very alluring tonight.

Even as they sat and talked, enjoying their beer, which a waitress kept coming to replace, both men couldn't help move a bit to the beats. Gilbert often looked out to the dance floor, Matthew knew he wanted to go find a girl to dance with, didn't make sense why he didn't just do that.

"Gilbert, just go dance, I'll be fine." He said as he friend stared out again.

"Huh? What are you talkin about Mattie?" He said looking at the blond like he missed something.

"I can see you want to, go on." He said, waving his hand at the floor.

Before he could open his mouth a pair of unfamiliar hands snaked down his front from behind, another female had come to stake some claim at the irresistible Prussian. She whispered right into his ear, Matthew swore he even saw her lick at it for effect, she must be drunk.

"You. Me. Floor. Now?" She purred.

Gilbert than pulled the cutest face Matthew had ever seen, like he just smelled a skunk mixed with eating a whole lemon. He pushed the girl off him and glared at her. "Bitch, don't you see I'm talkin to my best friend here?"

She glared right back, than looked at Matthew unimpressed by what she saw. "I can offer you a lot more fun than that." She smiled in attempt to be seductive and sway the man in her favor.

"Go whore somewhere else, not interested." He growled, she backed off fast after that, fleeing to find some other guy.

"How annoying." Gilbert huffed.

Matthew smiled pathetically. "Must be nice though…so much attention…" He said quietly, he was kinda hoping not to be heard, but Gilbert seemed to catch just everything.

"Hardly the kind I want, that bitch _licked_ me." He said disgusted. "I have no idea where that has been!"

"Her mouth generally." Matthew joked, grinning at the face his friend was making.

"Well, look at that, you do come out of your shell once in a while." Gilbert snorted. "I'm sure you get that plenty to."

Matthew laughed. "Oh no, I'm not as lickable as you are, Gil."

"Hmph, that is just debatable." He muttered. "So Mattie, you never did tell me what kinda girl you go for."

Matthew blushed, he thought that they had dropped this? "W-Well…I don't really…" He gulped, looking away.

"Come on, I'm still set on getting you laid tonight, kesese. " Matthew cursed, why was he so hell bent on that?

Matthew dropped his face into his hands. "I don't like girls, Gil." He mumbled and like always Gilbert heard every word.

"Oh. Fine, than what kinda guy do you like?" He said, not missing a beat.

Matthew's head shot up, staring confused at the Prussian sipping his beer. "What?" He asked.

"Y-You…don't care?" He asked meekly.

"Mattie, I'm bi, why would I care if you dig dudes? Dudes can be hot." Gilbert smirked and gestured to himself. "Exhibit A."

He smiled relieved. "A for awesome."

Gilbert's smirk grew wildly at his ego being stroked. "Fuck yea, you know it, I am the most awesomely hot guy here."

The blond's eyes dropped to half lidded. "Mm, that's for sure." He said softly, blushing right after looking away, hoping the Prussian would just take it as another compliment.

He saddened heard keseseing in his ear, making him shiver and look up into red eyes of his friend standing in front of him. "Let's dance Mattie."

Matthew spluttered, trying to protest as his up dragged to his feet and pulled to the busy floor, the music was thumping loudly, the beat moving to a rhythm he knew would spell trouble. Gilbert found them a spot no to many people were crowding but they were still forced to be close to each other. Without his jacket Matthew felt very exposed to Gilbert, it didn't help that his eyes looked like they were raping him as he placed his hands on his hips and pulled him close.

"G-Gil…I don't really dance…" He tried to yell over the music, those deep red eyes told him he had heard, he leaned over and whispered in his ear.

"Don't worry about it Mattie, as long as it's with you, it will be awesome." Matthew must have turned as red as Gilbert's eyes at that as another pulsating song started up. Everyone's bodies swaying and grinding up against each others. Matthew soon found that Gilbert was following the crowd's lead, pulling the boy very close and moving both of their hips to the music.

He blushed; he thought he would pass out with all this blood rushing around. He quickly wrapped his arms around Gilbert's neck and trying his best to follow his lead and not look into his eyes to much. It was very hard, seeing as he was staring right at him with some kind of look in his eyes. They stayed out on the dance floor for a couple of songs till Matthew couldn't stand it anymore; knowing he'd jump the Prussian if they danced much longer and finally went back to their table.

They ordered some more drinks, Gilbert going alone this time, bringing back much stronger stuff, not that Matthew minded at all. After a half hour of talking, laughing and drinking though changed all that.

"And than…and than! You know what he did? Oh it was epic, and than he goes right up to him and says, oh it was funny, says he need a rubber and Alfred just blush his ass off! It just OFF!" Matthew busted up laughing, Gilbert much more amused by Drunk Mattie than his story of Arthur asking for an eraser.

"Dude, you're so toasted right now." The Prussian laughed.

"I don't have any toast…" The lightweight said confused.

"Haha, I'm sure you don't, look I'll be right back, don't go anywhere…or talk to anyone." He said and left to go the bathroom

When he returned the next events he swears made this the best and worst night ever. (But mostly the best) A voice rang over the loud speaker, the music turned down very very low and crowd of people were standing back or sitting at the tables set in front of what must have been a retractable stage, cause that sure as hell wasn't there before.

"That's right everyone, it is now time for what you've all been waiting for. Amateur Night!" The voice said cheerfully, far too cheerful.

As Gilbert wondered what the hell that meant, he soon noticed that his little Canadian was not where he had left him. "Damn he wander off. Fuck."

"First on the stage!" The voice boomed and cheers erupted as a pole was lowered to the stage. Gilbert stared very confused, this was not usually a strip club! "Welcome Mr. Maple!" (lame I know STFU)

"…Couldn't be…" But he was proven very wrong as a giggling drunk Matthew stepped up on the stage, waving at the crowd happy off his ass. The people hooted and hollered, one guy yelling to get naked.

The Canadian only swayed a little as the music started to play, dirty striper music, and grabbed the pole, looking at it in wonder, like he didn't know what it was.

Gilbert was about to go grab him off the stage till the blond started swaying his hips in a rather delicious way, holding the pole with both hands and dipping himself backwards, face grinning at the crowd, his glasses slipping off his face. He pulled himself back up, twirling around the pole, hooking the side of his foot at the base of it and one hand on it, swinging all way around the pole, dipping down low and pulling himself back up flush against the pole.

The Prussian could only stare as the cheers increased and clapping came all around. Matthew caught eyes with Gilbert and smirked at him, giving him a wink and slowly lowered himself down the pole, spread his knees the lower he got. He turned himself around, holding the pole behind himself, gliding his ass up the pole. His fans losing their minds as he bucked his hips; twirling around the pole again. Facing the pole once more, moving his hips as if he were humping it, he kept his eyes on Gilbert's, biting his lip and blushing brightly.

At this point the albino could no longer stand it, he jumped up on the stage and pulled the Canadian off the pole, this was meet with many boos and unpleasant choice of words. He threw the boy over his shoulder, carrying him out the back, screw their tab, their coats, he could buy another one. He had a fucking sexy Canadian that needed molesting.

Matthew gasped as he was set on his feet and shoved against a brick wall, hungry crimson eyes putting such pressure on him he thought he would explode from the gaze.

"G-Gil?" He said nervously, his mind a bit clearer now; he was kind of surprised he wasn't raped by now the way he was being stared at.

"Mattie…I know your drunk…but fuck!" He said looking off at the dirty alley they were in. "That dancing man…"

"I-I'm sorry…I don't what came over me…" He said softly, feeling guilty…for an unknown reason, but Gilbert seemed upset.

"Don't be sorry!" He snapped, trapping his gaze once more. "You were fucking hot." He purred, smirking very predator like at him.

Matthew blushed, he felt like that's all he's been doing all night. "R-Really?" He said shyly, averting his gaze.

Gilbert took his chin and forced him to look at him. "Oh fuck yes, you are so fucking hot." It really took everything he had not to ravish the boy there and then, but Mattie deserved better than that. "Where did you learn how to do that?"

Matthew's face grew redder. "J-Just the way I d-dance a-around…"

"Mattie…"

"Y-Yea Gil?"

"I'm happy you're gay."

"W-What?" He was instantly answered with a very ravishing kiss that blew his mind to pieces, he shut his eyes and kissed back without second thought, this is what he's been wanting all night.

Gilbert pressed flush up against the boy, kissing him deeply not giving him a chance, his hands already wandering up that tight shirt; he felt arms around his neck not much longer. Not as slow as he thought he was gonna go, but fuck, pole dancing was not apart of this plan now was it?

A tiny moan escaped the blond as those hands lay claimed to the virgin skin that was now exposed, he couldn't believe his luck, he should have pole danced sooner. Another moan left him as the older man's lips traveled his neck and bit and sucked at his skin, he barely cared if any marks were left, and his brain was too fuzzy to care about that.

Matthew buried his hand into those silvery locks as the albino bit down harder, truly trying to leave his claim on the boy, earning very pleasurable moan. Gilbert was very oh sooo very tempted to live up to that promise of getting Matthew laid tonight, but that would have to wait. Mattie was too classy to have raunchy hot passionate sex up against a brick wall in an alley behind a bar…this didn't really help Gilbert out, just tempted him more.

"Mm, fuck Mattie, you're so damn hot." He muttered against his neck, working on another mark on the other side of his neck.

"Giiil…" He moaned out, he couldn't form any other word, his head and body was drowning in pleasure, never had he been touched in such ways.

Gilbert reluctantly pulled away from the boy, the blond panting heavily and flushed so nicely that he was almost rethinking this whole don't fuck him thing…Almost. "Mattie…if you couldn't tell." He smirked. "I like you."

Matthew rolled his eyes, way to kill the moment dude. "Yea…I got that." He said, pulling the Prussian back into a very deep heated kiss. "I like you to, now less talking more touching me." He said, licking at the man's bottom lip.

Gilbert smirked, maybe he would be having some fun after all. "Only at my place, babe."

Matthew pulled Gilbert closer to him, so he could whisper in his ear, his voice having become husky from the passion. "Nein, ich brauche sie jetzt." Never had Gilbert's native tongue ever sound as sinfully sexy as it did as it left the Canadian's sweet lips.

"Fuck…Mattie.." He was going to ask for more conformation, but as the blond lifted himself up to wrap his legs around his waist, he found that pointless. He supposed he was keeping that promise after all, the thought made him smirk as he went back to devouring that sweet neck. Sweet moans filled the night air, he only pulled away to rid the younger boy of his shirt, the rough brick rubbing against his pale skin and Matthew loved it, groaning at the friction.

Gilbert moved to claim that beautiful mouth once more, his tongue forcing its way in, storming in and taking every inch for himself, wrapping his tongue around Matthew's, sucking at it roughly. Heavenly sounds were his reward for his actions, along with the blond's hips grinding into his, causing him to groan into his mouth. Matthew clawed at the offending shirt the Prussian wore, the damned thing keeping from feeling skin against his own. Gilbert got the hint pulled away, ridding himself of it, going right back to the invading of that virgin mouth, pressing flush against the boy.

Matthew whimpered at the constriction his pants were giving him, he was hard as fuck and the damn skin tight pants were nothing but a pain at this point, he ground his erection into Gilberts, feeling the older man's was in just as much discomfort. He removed one arm from the Prussian's neck to undo the man's pants. It proved very hard to do with the haze of pleasure making his actions sloppy, but he got it in the end and pushed down the pants with his legs as he lowered his hips.

"M-Mein gott…" Gilbert gasped at the freedom and friction of Matthew's jeans, he was thankful he decided to not wear underwear tonight.

Matthew could feel Gilbert against him, he looked down thoroughly impressed and a little scared of that going inside of him, but the thought also excited him greatly. He looked back up at those ruby eyes, coated in lust and passion, passion for him, it made his heart swell.

"G-Gil…please…" He begged, he ground his hips into him once again, moaning softly, biting his lip. Gilbert obeyed instantly, keeping the boy supported against the wall and up with is hips, he quickly undid the boy's pants and pulled them down, pulling away to pull them down past his knees, pulling a little bottle out of his own pants pocket. This got him a curious look.

"Lube." He smirked. "Best to be prepared." He purred, ripping the boy's pants all the way off, throwing them to the dirty floor. "This is gonna be uncomfortable and a little painful…but I swear, I will make you feel so fucking awesome." He said softly, looking into those innocent violet-blue eyes. Matthew nodded, taking deep breaths to relax and prepare himself; he was only a virgin after all.

The Prussian generously coated his fingers with the slippery stuff, rubbing it gently against the boy's entrance, trying to relax the muscles. He whispered softly into the boy's ear. "I love you, Matthew."

Matthew gasped in surprise at the words and the digit slipping inside him, Gilbert was right, it felt very weird, but not horrible. Especially as he started to move it in and out, rubbing against his walls, stretching them. He spread his legs to make it go even deeper, causing him to moan at the feeling, wanting more of the Prussian inside of him. He got his wish as another was added, moving faster and moving in a scissoring motion, pushing against the wall. Matthew screamed out when they brushed against something deep inside him, Gilbert smirked and brushed against it again and again. Pleasured cries ripped from the boy each time, he was so distracted by the overwhelming pleasure he hadn't noticed the third digit was added till they were gone.

The blond whimpered at the loss, wanting more, his erection becoming almost painful and his lust growing to dangerously high levels. It felt like forever as Gilbert slicked up that huge cock of his, Matthew's thoughts drifted faintly to how the albino really wasn't kidding when he said he was well endowed. Finally he felt the tip press against him; he moaned in pure joy that he was finally going to have Gilbert inside of him. Ruby eyes looked deeply into his, worry was evident in them, Gilbert was so sweet. Matthew pulled him into a very passionate kiss, reassuring him that this is what he wanted.

Matthew groaned and winced as he was slowly entered, god this hurt! He felt like his muscles were tearing from the stretching, he gasped harshly. Gilbert paused half way in, which took a lot of restraint to do, the boy was sooo fucking tight, such delicious heat too. He panted heavily, waiting for the boy to adjust to his size, willing himself not to buck his hips and hurt him more.

The blond dug and twisted his fingers into the silver locks of his love, shutting his eyes tightly so tears couldn't escape him, what if Gilbert backed out of this? He need him, he's wanted him since he first met the albino, sexy bastard. He knew it would be stupid, but he slammed his hips down, sheathing all of Gilbert's cock. He screamed at the pain and pleasure of being filled to the brim, he never experienced anything like it and he loved it.

"M-Mattie!" Gilbert gasped. "I-Idiot…are you okay?" He saw the tears slipping down his face, he had to will the pleasured haze from his mind to focus.

"Y-Yea…" He took a deep breath, focusing only on the pleasure of Gilbert, the pain fading to a dull ache. "M-Move dammit…"

"Are you sur~" The older man was cut off by Matthew lifting his hips and slamming them back down on his length. "G-Gott!" Gilbert groaned, deciding no more questions or Matthew would just end up hurting himself, even if the boy was crying out in pleasure. He decided to obey the request and began to move, he started up slow and gentle, easing them both into the most mind blowing thing either of them had experienced.

His safe slow pace didn't last all that long, moving faster and spreading the boy's legs more to go deeper as the beautiful sounds increased. Matthew moaned and begged for more, which is what he got and then some, he couldn't believe that this was actually happening.

"GOD!" The blond screamed as that something inside him was touched again, Gilbert quickly made sure to angle himself to hit that spot again, getting his name screamed up towards the heavens, telling him he got it dead on. He pounded away at that sweet spot in his angelic Canadian, getting to hear those sweet sounds and deep moans they shared.

Gilbert could feel himself getting close, this damned boy being far too sexy for his own good, he could tell Matthew was too, with this nails digging into his neck and his toes curled, screaming his head off. He quickly wrapped his fingers firmly around the boy's weeping member and pumped him in time with is thrusts, hitting his prostate over and over.

The normally quiet boy grew even more vocal at all the stimulation all at once, it was far too much for him to bear, he felt like he would explode, heat tightening at the pit of his stomach. "You're f-fuckin awesome, M-Mattie." Gilbert whispered into his ear and he was pushed over the edge, he came hard upon their stomachs, some splattering to the ground, screaming louder than he had all night, the Prussian's name heard by the whole city.

Gilbert felt Matthew's walls clamp down on him so tightly that was all it took for him to cum deep inside the boy, moaning the Canadian's name in sweet ecstasy. He braced them both against the wall as their heavy pants intertwined and he rested his forehead against his lover's.

"G-God…" The blond panted heavily, trying to catch his breath as he came down slowly from his high.

Gilbert smirked, panting lightly. "God is so formal~" Matthew cut off his shitty joke with a gentle kiss.

"Don't ruin the moment, bitch." He said, kissing him again.

"Oh I'm the bitch, huh?" Gilbert asked, raising a brow, when did his little Mattie ever cuss? He got a sharp look and he dropped it. "Right, no ruining the moment." He smirked, kissing the boy tenderly. "I love you, Mattie."

Matthew's erratic heart increased its beating. "I love you, Gilbert." He said softly.

"You know you belong to me now, right?" Gilbert smirked.

Matthew sighed, but smiled at the Prussian. "Yes, I'm aware of that…you better keep me for a long time."

"Kesese, oh I plan to, you're too awesome to give up." The blond blushed brightly at that, the older man only used the word awesome about himself, it meant a lot to hear that. "Now, how about we move this to my place?"

Matthew nodded, suddenly feeling completely embarrassed, being buck naked in the back alley of a bar. "Eh, where are my glasses?"

"Kesese, on the stage." That wicked lustful look coming back to those crimson eyes. "At my place, we should go for round two."

"M-Maple…"


End file.
